You can keep your yellow dots…

…because I badly want to munch on a few of these suckers.

(via Popped Culture)

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March 31, 2009 at 3:06 pm Leave a comment

15 seemingly everyday things that I cannot do

  1. Read in the bathtub.  I hate the feeling of having my hands above the hot water, and I dread the idea of dropping my book.  It’s the worst kind of torture, because it really does sound like the best way to bath.
  2. Whistle.  Never have, likely never will.
  3. Long division.  If my kids are expecting help with their homework, they have another thing coming.
  4. Keep my room tidy.  The culprit boils down to two things: stray papers (assignments mostly) and laundry.
  5. Chai tea.  I don’t get it.  It’s like Kensington Market in a drink.  That’s not a good thing.
  6. Ignore the television. Seriously, I want to see what Billy Mays’ Mighty Putty can do for me.
  7. Study for a test more than two days in advance.  You know, I think I WILL go for a two hour walk. In the rain.
  8. See someone lighting a BBQ or a fireplace and not think darkly to myself “You’re doing it wrong”.
  9. Sleep in with someone else. Because it’s such a nice DAY outside!
  10. Not blog when I have an idea for a blog post.  Like making lists.
  11. Fold laundry in my regular clothes.  For some reason, messing around with the warm laundry while wearing jeans has this negative reaction with my skin and I end up sweaty and itchy and tired.  It’s pajamas or nothing.
  12. Go to sleep without browsing the Internet first. The Web is my first, my last, my everything.
  13. Listen to music without air-drumming, -guitaring, -bassing, bouncing my feet.  *points at head* Up here, it’s fucking Royal Albert Hall every day.
  14. Avoid panic when I can’t find my stupid hat.  It really doesn’t look that good on me, but I have some kind of soul connection to that hat that sends me into Fight Mode if someone takes it off of me, or hides it.  Ugh.
  15. Not follow the Regular Wash Protocol when I shower.  Left arm, left collarbone, back of neck, shoulders, chest, stomach, legs, right arm, armpits, behind ears, shampoo, face, shampoo/face rinse, stand immobile under hot water for a few minutes.  In that exact order, every time.

March 30, 2009 at 12:58 pm 6 comments

AWOL

Everything has been busy, so I’ve not been updating much.  Pulling this website together is taking for-fucking-ever, you might say.

From The Onion

WASHINGTON—An overwhelming sense of restlessness and impatience engulfed the U.S. this week when citizens determined that everything—the morning commute, phone conversations, getting a table at Chili’s, making coffee, commercial breaks, everything—was taking entirely too long.

[…]

Further analysis revealed that 54 percent of respondents are not getting any younger over here. Nearly 10 percent don’t understand what the big holdup is. And 23 percent are not only ready, but have been ready for the past half hour, so let’s go already.

Several thousand respondents hung up their telephones before answering all of the poll’s questions.

I promise to do my best to not slack on updates as hard as I have been.  You’re all busy people.

Editor’s Note:  Is there some kind of homosexual code I’m not aware of?  I did a Google Image search for photos relating to either “AWOL” or “missing in action” because of my non-existent blog life, sized 450px wide (a good size for this blog), and I get a disconcerting number of hits having to do with gay porn.  Seriously, what gives?

So the photo at the top had the caption “Mika’s gay fanbase mysteriously missing in action” when I found it.  In case you were wondering.

March 28, 2009 at 12:21 pm Leave a comment

It’s not you. It’s me.

I am so ready to go home, it’s not even worth talking about anymore.  I like Halifax, I really do.  And I’ve made some excellent friends here, with whom I hope I’ll keep in contact.  The program has been good, even if I’ve had my fill of it by now.

I just want to go HOME.  And by home, I don’t even mean Aurora (exactly).  I just want to be in Ontario.  Does anybody remember me saying, during the Summer of ’08, that I was eager to “get out of this province”?  Well, I’ve had my fill.  People out here give you a weird look when you tell them that you actually miss Ontario.  Usually an eyebrow is raised.  More often than not, expect a “But why? It’s so easy-going and relaxed here! The people are so much nicer! Ontario sucks!”

One:  Ontario, for all its evils, is still pretty sweet.  Ottawa is a great city, and Toronto has its charms. We have two hockey teams, and a cheap baseball game. Theatres have late showtimes.  There’s energy in the streets.  We get the best movies first and there’s more journalism/media work.  Our concerts are better.

Two:  Yes, I know.  People on the east coast are, invariably, nicer and more approachable than Ontarians.  But I have nice, approachable friends.  And I’m not very good at making conversation with strangers, so the whole “friendly Easterner” thing is wasted on me.

Three:  I hate admitting this to myself, but the different-pace-of-life atmosphere that the east coast has is absolutely true, and not really for me.  I like feeling a bit of buzz.  There’s not much buzz to be had out here.  It feels isolated from the rest of the country (I can’t imagine what Newfoundland or PEI is like).  Even worse, I feel isolated from the city.  It’s tough to go out there and not feel like a stranger.  I could come to love it after another year or so, but I don’t see the point.

It’s great for some, not for me.  I can see everything that there is to enjoy about Nova Scotia, and I’ve enjoyed a lot of it, but I want Ontario.  Should you visit here?  Absolutely.  Come for a month.  Want longer?  Come for a year — you’ll love it.

The bars are great, the people are nice, the city is walkable, you’re near the ocean, there’s myriad streams and forests and untouched greenery, the housing is gorgeous, there’s a vibrant arts scene and it’s the quintessential university town.  It’s just not for me.

Sorry, Halifax.  I think we need a break.  I have this other love, one that I didn’t tell you about up front.  She’s a few thousand kilometres away.  I don’t know if you’d get along, exactly, but she’s nice and fits me just right.

 

 

 

….P.S.  I still harbour dreams of moving to Alberta.  ‘Twill be my next torrid affair.

March 15, 2009 at 10:03 pm 4 comments

Online Journalism

img_77491

I’ve added a link to the list at the right for a great blog I’ve found, cunningly called Online Journalism Blog.  Guess what they talk about.

Seriously, if you’re at all interested in the industry, or even in how New Media is changing every day, it’s a great site.  It’s written by a guy named Paul Bradshaw and a team of contributors.  It’s easy to read, entertaining, and informative.  Much like this blog.

March 13, 2009 at 2:37 pm 2 comments

I need a job

Because I want to try and see at least a few of these bands live before they pull a third or fourth-album breakup.  This is a crazy good list for Toronto show.  LOOK at these!  And the thing is, most of the bands I want to see happen after I come home and aren’t really a part of Canadian Music Week.

Except this one, which I can’t be home for anyway (fuck my life):

Handsome Furs <new album streaming here> – March 13 @ the Horseshoe 

But check THIS out:

Ladyhawk – April 23 @ the Horseshoe

The Thermals – May 3 @ the Horseshoe

Plants and Animals – May 7 @ Mod Club**

TV on the Radio – June 2 @ Sound Academy

Grizzly Bear – June 5 @ Phoenix

This is really just a way of saying to all you fine, fine people: come with me.  I don’t wanna go alone.  I missed a buttload of good shows last summer (QOTSA and The Black Keys).  You and I should share the joy.

** I don’t really want to see Plants and Animals that bad, though I hear they put on a good show.  I just irritatingly missed my chance to see them in Halifax and I feel a little burned by it.

March 11, 2009 at 8:53 am Leave a comment

Hmm…

Cease to Begin

 

I’m having one of those moments where, just by listening to a CD you haven’t heard in a while, you can be taken instantly back to the first month or so that you had it in your possession.

It’s killing me that I can’t remember exactly when I bought the Bands of Horses Cease to Begin album.  It feels like it should have been early in fourth year, but it could have even been that summer prior (I remember sending the link for “The Great Salt Lake”, from their first album, to Cait that summer and rhapsodizing about it).

Anyway, the song that’s bringing me back is “Ode to LRC“.  And then the album keeps going, into “No One’s Gonna Love You” and “Detlef Schrempf”.  It’s funny; just the sound is enough to make me recall these strong feelings of…what is it?  It’s kind of beyond language.  Moroseness, maybe.  Longing almost certainly.

And just now, “The General Specific” fires up and breaks that mood.  Because I put this song on a mix CD for Cait a few months ago, so now that’s how the song is hardwired most prominently in my memory.  Ironically (is it irony?), I had written in the CD’s liner notes that I particularly liked this song because it wasn’t linked to ANYTHING in my memory.  It was kind of island, floating serenely up there amid all the jumbled garbage.  Now it’s not anymore.  That’s ok though.

I know nostalgia is the most dangerous emotion, but I miss St. Catharines dammit.  I swore up and down that I wouldn’t be one of those people who ached for the good old days, and God knows I didn’t have a particularly strong affection for Brock University when I was there. 

Marry Song“.  It’s a good one too.  Sheesh, these songs can put me anywhere they like.

March 4, 2009 at 7:38 pm 1 comment

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About Upper Lip

It's mostly a collection of sweet links and copious amounts of talk talk talk. I like it more and more every day. And yes, even the ugly blue/green color scheme is not without a certain charm.

Yours Truly

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And I'm email enabled at steven.j.woodhead@gmail.com

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